Today, we wandered around downtown for a while because it was such a nice day out. Since it was a weekend, it was spectacularly uncrowded, and I loved it. We hit the coffee shop, the bookstore, the tattoo parlor, etc. When we done wasting time, we walked back to the car. The sidewalk we were walking on runs parallel to a tall iron fence that separates the street from Congress park.
When we were nearing the car, I heard some quacking, and when I looked toward the fence I saw a mallard duck walking on the grass. Through the bars, I spotted a kid and his mom walking on the path toward the duck. The kid was running ahead a little bit, his hand outstretched. He was holding a cracker or a piece of bread or something — obviously trying to feed the duck. His mom wasn’t exactly keen on the idea, and she was desperately calling him back. “Josh! Leave the ducks alone! They aren’t hungry!”
I am a sucker for wildlife of any sort, and so before we got into the car I decided to quickly run up to the fence and see what I could see. I got to the fence just in time to realize that the ducks in question were actually pretty hungry after all.
It turns out there were two males and a female, and the lone female didn’t seem to be having a very good time of it. Or maybe she was having a good time — I confess to not knowing what sort of kinky stuff chick-ducks are into these days. One male was holding the female by the neck with his beak and humping the shit out of her while the other male looked on and quacked his encouragement. I’m not sure if he just liked to watch, or if he was waiting his turn, but I quickly turned back toward the car to let them have their privacy.
In retrospect though, given the fact that they were busily rough-humping a foot away from the sidewalk, I’m pretty sure they didn’t care all that much about their privacy. Apparently, hot, juicy duck-love overrides all inhibitions.
At least I knew why mom wasn’t too keen on letting junior attempt to shove crackers at them, and I applaud her– because if there’s one thing I hate, it’s when complete strangers try to feed me crackers while I’m attempting to get busy. It really wrecks the mood.*